We all know what a commencement speech should sound like. The thanks, the laughs, the script—we can picture them. The best speakers understand this about their audience and try to subvert expectations. Sometimes, past speakers have begun with surprises, like delivering the first minute of their performance in American Sign Language. Other times, speakers surprised us at the end by withholding information that changes our perspective on their speeches. Think of opportunities you have to anticipate our expectations and catch us off guard.

Commencement is a time for celebration, togetherness, and recognition of shared accomplishments. Your speech should reflect this! However, the most successful speakers will also be aware of common cliches in commencement speeches and avoid them. They will look for examples of past speakers and find a way to attend to the moment without sounding stale.

Many potential speakers feel they must capture the totality of their Iowa careers. But successful speakers will recognize that a brief address is insufficient to do it all. Instead, they will pick a smaller message—some specific lesson, idea, or individual takeaway from their time here—and focus on that, even if it means leaving out other ideas that also resonate with them.

Speakers often roll stories together to try and address lots of memories without spending much time on any of them: “We all remember the late-night study sessions; the trips to Mesa Pizza; the sweetness of success and the bitterness of failure.” Such gestures sound great but leave the audience without substance. More successful speakers will pick one or two anecdotes and spend time fully describing and unpacking them, turning them into full stories we can grab onto.

There is something we can learn from you. Perhaps it’s tied to your identity: who you are, and how you’ve changed here. Perhaps it’s tied to something that happened to you. Whatever the case, personally connecting to the audience has been a successful strategy for many past commencement speakers.